Wicked Modus Operandi

Source : http://tinyurl.com/3pctyss

I recently realized that I have a specific modus operandi when I'm in allergic-and-hate mode with else. Virtually, if that specific person who becomes my source of annoyance happens to be my "friend" in YM, Skype or GTalk, I'll "kick" her/him out of it, -either by blocking or deleting. After a few days or weeks (or even months), if I succeeded to sort out my hatred to that specific person, I'll "invite" her/him again to my instant messenger services. If I failed to do so, or if that person gets on my nerves even more than before, I'll execute my next step, -unfriend/unfollow her/him from any social media like Facebook or Twitter. What if I met that person in person? I'll simply ignore her/him as if she/he's not exist in this world. Scary, huh?

How can I be that wicked? Why I couldn't just forgive and forget my hatred to else? I have my answer to that questions. I'm building my bastion to protect that person. Seriously, Bung? From what? From my fury-ugly verbal/non-verbal assaults. It's true that I can be very rude and barbaric to someone I don't like. Trust me. And guess what, I can do that without even saying a word. My gestures can boldly express my hatred. See? I'm VERY DANGEROUS at that moment. Hence, because I understand to the bones who I really am, I don't have any choice except being temporarily wicked to the person I have a problem with. The good news is, I'm getting good in dealing with this matter. It means that, the duration to "alienate" the specific person is getting shorter. Did you know that I ever estranged a person for 3 YEARS? Three consecutive YEARS. Even we were a classmates, who literally met everyday (*except on a holiday, for sure). Oh my...I was beyond BAD. But now, it's getting easier for me to sort my feelings out. Alhamdulillah. I'm still learning how to completely x-out this horrible thing of mine. I really want to be a person who can easily forgive someone, as simple as snapping my fingers. Nothing is impossible, isn't it?